It's been a long time since I have paid much attention to this place. I haven't been the best parent to this Blog and I think it's something I need to remedy. If my blog was Aaliyah I think I'd have to be Timberland or maybe Jet Li? I dunno which one but in the mortal words of the deep n dusty voiced lumberjack;
It's been a long time,( long time) we shouldn't of left you (left you),Without a dope beat to step to (step to, step to, step to, step to).It's been a long time (long time), we shouldn't of left you (left you),
Without a dope beat to step to (step to, step to, step to, step to)
It's about time I come back inside and sit by the fire and share some of the work I have been busy making the past while. I just didn't have a dope beat to step to until now. The guys over at Streets Of Beige have sent me that beat in the form of a sweet brief for a fine beast of a show. Let me tell you about Plastik Schmack. This is a show that challenges all the artists involved to leave behind their usual 3D or 2D creation techniques and step into the world of the boot leg toy. Each of the 30 artists in the show have been asked to decapitate, amputate, melt and disembowel their old toys and regenerate them into their own boot leg creation. A welcoming challenge that I for one was very excited about but upon making my creation realised that I had no old toys in the new gaff I moved into. Shocking I know. To think I moved house and packed boring grown up shit like clothes and furniture over toys. My childhood is still weeping.
On a quick visit back home to my folks I yet again completely forgot to rummage through my old toys. Yet again another goal for my grown up age. Sick. Upon driving out the drive way I remembered and made a speedy dash up the stairs grabbing whatever came into view first. It wasn't until a few days later when I looked at the loot I'd snagged that I realised what an utterly shit collection of toys I had. What thee fook was I gonna make with an old eagle eyes Action man head, a sputtering 1990's pirate and a Micro Machines Admiral Ackbar Star Wars playset??? The amount of Turtle toys I have and thats what I grabbed!!
Then one Sunday night whilst sipping on the late night thinkers hot brew it dawned on me that all the toys had exactly the same skin tones. They had something in common. As a decapitated Action Man and Admiral watched on I humiliated a once fierce pirate and stripped him naked. To my shock and amusement I discovered that not only was this pirate a Eunuch but he was also wearing the whitest socks I had ever seen. I began to suspect that perhaps this was a pirate after all but merely a hustler in the toy community. It was around this time that I caught the eagle eye of Action Man. He was right. I needed to put his head on the Eunuch Pirates body. I still had no idea where this was going and felt a serious pang of guilt as I just remembered that this wasn't my Pirate, it was my mate Ben's. I realised this mid POP! Sorry Ben, it's not the easiest thing to tell a grown up mate.
After some fiddling around....wait I'm still talking about a naked decapitated Pirate so let me rephrase. After messing this whack shit right up I eventually had my figure. But I wasn't too sure what that figure was or about? I lay him on the table, sat back with my tea and through my mind over to far away places down the Channel 4 rabbit hole. I sat there looking at the screen with one eye and the other on this wired little man thing I just made. His little sad eyes looking at me with a Frankenstein stare. He looked like something that would be on a Channel 4 docu...HOLYFUCKINSHIT!!!! Eureka!
It wasn't until I popped those little white socks on him that he screamed Embarrassing Bodies. Is anything more embarrassing than a naked man wearing nothing but his socks? Yep a naked Eunuch wearing nothing but socks with a great big Star Wars tumour on his bleedin chest mate! The rest came together pretty quick after that.
With some dodgey photoshopping on the packaging and some accessories such as a cotton bud, a surgical blade, box of C3P BLOWS Tissues and a little tube of creme he was ready to be shipped out to infect an entire gallery.
Show opens on Friday the 19th at the SOB Gallery in Bristol. Check out more info here on their open invite page.
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